1 week before we leave for Edmonton.

Today is exactly one week before we leave for Edmonton and it feels like our lives are about to change forever.  So many emotions come with that, anxious, scared, nervous, just simply not being sure what this journey  is all about, just trusting and believing that we are in God’s hands and he will lead us through the way and never let us go, always holding us by the hand.

As I have began to pack up our house, it actually feels like we are moving away and I get sad about it, I feel like I am leaving everything behind.  At least everything that is of comfort and we are use to having on a daily basis.  We just got back from my parents place from a goodbye party for my Brother and his wife and little son. They are moving to Toronto and leaving the same day as we leave to Edmonton.  I feel like so much is changing and it’s becoming a bit overwhelming and I don’t want to be sad, but I find myself getting the feeling come over me and I really don’t like it.  I start thinking how I will miss everyone while we are gone, yet I start to think that this is how it’s suppose to be, life can’t always be so comfortable, mind you life with two little kids under the age of three is always entertaining and a challenge to say the least, from potty training to tantrums to endless cleaning and endless yelling to get something done.  But really in the great scheme  of things, that is what normal parenting is all about and I wouldn’t trade it for anything and at the end of each day, it’s been worth it and some days are easier than others and that’s OK.

I just know that this journey at this time of our lives will be a big change for sure, but also a blessing and I think that’s what gets me through the sad/overwhelming moments.  It’s not easy to let go of comfort yet sometimes we have to because “God not only knows where he is taking us, but he also knows how to get us there”   I guess as humans, trusting and letting go of things is not so easy.  I think about times when we tell our kids to do something and they either don’t get it or are being stubborn or choose to do the wrong thing.  Well I am sure we are the same as adults when God is asking us to do something how come we don’t just listen.  I know our kids trust us but choose to be disobedient so many times, so is that how we are when God is trying to tell us something and we just don’t want to get out of our comfort zone.

I think about how Jesus died in the cross and it was the most brutal death you can imagine, yet God being everything and could have easily changed those circumstances and made things so much easier.  He allowed for those circumstances to happen, not that he wanted to have that happen to Jesus, but what came out of it all was greater than all of us.   Jesus died in the cross for all of us, so we can now have a personal relationship with God. it’s amazing really, but I think about our situation that we are going through and of course we have prayed for healing of the baby’s heart and so far none of the ultrasounds have shown us any changes or at least that the Dr’s can see, yet I know that God isn’t showing us his miracle just yet, but I know there will be one.